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Gumby. We usually call our contestants by their first names, so what does the 'D.P.' stand for ?" " I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that, Mr. Gumby" " That's ok, Mr. Gumby. I understand that you must be pretty nervous, being on national TV and we're the hottest quiz show on the telly at the moment, so we'll just call you 'D.P.' then...is that OK ?" " And over to you, Miss Ratcatcher-Bucket...welcome to the show, Ophelia. My oh my, young lady that's quits a set of bazookas you're sporting there and might I add that you're looking particularly repulsive this evening. The warts are a nice touch, did you do them yourself or do they run in the family ? Tell the audience a bit about yourself" I'm a welder and I collect stamps and car registration numbers in my spare time, Kat. The warts were in the box I grew up in. Dad must have left them in there for me so they must be hereditary and I wear them all the time. Oh, and btw, D.P. can't talk. Hasn't got a tongue, you see. My sister said. They were going to branch out into a clothing line, they told us. They'd be selling -- and Tess would be wearing -- TESLA-designed clothing, as well.They gave her lots of written materials -- all in excellent English. Pie charts. Colorful graphs. Payment schedules. Numbers of days in a year when Tess would be expected to make herself available for special events, production of television commercials, and other activities associated with the contract. She would be expected to play, annually, in at least two Asian tournaments, out of four specified.We didn't have to take very many notes. We had notebooks full, courtesy of TESLA and the corporation's advertising agency.We left the meeting a little stunned."Do you realize what this means?" I told her. "They're offering you more money, I'm certain, than any female golfer has ever been offered for a similar deal. Jeez! When Tiger turned pro, he got $40 million, right out the door -- but, my God, he was Tiger! This is a whole bunch of.
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